Last movie seen in a theatre?
Race
What book are you reading?
nothing as of now. the last i read was samit basu’s third from the trilogy.
Favourite board game?
ludo
Favorite Magazine:
national geographic
Favorite Smells:
cy face when she is sleeping, baby mouths (the constant cheese smell :)), roses, fresh waffles being made, cakes being baked, fresh rotis
Favorite Sound:
thunder
Worst Feeling In The World:
no money in the bank
What Is The First Thing You Think Of When You Wake?
is it morning already?
Favorite Fast Food Places:
umm … uhuh …
Future Child’s Name:
N, or K :)
Finish This Statement. “If I Had A Lot Of Money I’d…”
Travel….incessantly (same as M’s. :))
Do You Drive Fast?
No. i don’t drive.
Do You Sleep With A Stuffed Animal?
cy does. so technically i do too .. :)
Storms-Cool Or Scary?
Cool … damn cool …
Do You Eat The Stems On Broccoli?
yes
If You Could Dye Your Hair Any Color, What Would Be Your Choice?
mahogany
Name All The Different Cities/Towns You Have Lived In.
delhi, abu dhabi, kualalumpur, bangalore, mumbai, pune
Favorite Sports To Watch:
ummm…..
One Nice Thing About The Person Who Sent This To You:
she’s all nice :)
What’s Under Your Bed?
lots of dust and cob-webs
Would You Like To Be Born As Yourself Again?
i’d like to see all options
Morning Person Or Night Owl?
Both, I think
Over Easy Or Sunny Side Up?
both
Favorite Place To Relax
Anywhere by the sea
Favorite Pie:
apple - piping hot
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor:
vanilla
You pass this tag to –
no one
i fell ill soon after the trip. a hint of a cold turned into a full fledged nose blocking, throat scorching monster that night i slept after having a cold, cold pouch of butter milk as i was feeling so thirsty.
M just mentioned, “sometimes i think the most irresponsible people get to have kids”
it feels correct. maybe it’s nature’s way to try and make those people more responsible .. mend their ways.
i went on an impromptu 5-day trip. tiring, fun, and a first step towards a new future … future … new life …
i want to write. i want to produce, to create, to …. to express. till recently i couldn’t express as much as i liked to as i think i lacked on a very important ingredient: feelings. my all encompassing laziness has grown its tentacles over all facets of my life, my being. i feel too lazily. there have been days when i did nothing but sleep all day and read all night, horizontally positioned, in bed exactly the way i spent the days. people might have thought that maybe i was depressed or something, but i was very happy in those days. very content, at peace. i could’ve very well retired. but then … my womanhood stood .. bang in front me, completely obstructing my way to moksha and complete submission to parents money and cheap books.
cy has fever. yesterday i was feeling that maybe she fell sick because of me. coz of late, everytime i look at her, i feel this overwhelming desire to appreciate her. i am scared to feel it now, lest i put the evil eye on her again. but it’s so not fair. not being able to say, to appreciate, nice things you feel about your own child. my li’l angel. she truly is an angel. not the every-parent-feels-that-way kind of way. she truly is. sometimes i feel like dressing her up as ma lakshmi and do pranam. it started when we were shopping for shoes for her and she tried on these gold sandals. her feet looked so, so, so beautiful, so pretty … exquisite. i looked up in awe, and caught sul’s expression. her eyes, they were beaming, sul’s eyes, looking at those pretty, little feet, and she said that they look like ma lokhi’s paanv (mother lakshmi’s feet) … and i nodded in agreement .. smiling. :)
what do i want to say? hmmm….. i don’t know. there’s nothing on my mind right now. except that it is just too hot outside and i wish i could get some ganna juice. i love ganna juice. for a long, long time i kept cy away from it, cos mom had said that it is highly unhygienic the way the ganna juice walas extract the juice so kids should not go anywhere near the heap of germs and diseases. :) but now i think that she should not be kept from the manna on earth, so i let her have it. the first time, about a month back i think, i was disappointed to not detect any rupturous delight in her when she took the first sip. she didn’t even finish the glass.
cy and i were watching cartoon in the morning as is the ritual now. she needs cartoon on TV to ingest her breakfast apprently. so cartoon on tv she gets. she is her mother’s daughter. :) so we were watching ‘Bat Fink’ when i heard this truly hilarious dialog:
some guy in the police station: bat fink, we need you. the grease gus ran off with the police money.
bat fink: so why doesn’t the police follow the grease gus?
that guy: well, the police say they won’t work until they get their salary.
:0) i think it was just too cute.
_________________________________________________________________
i again haven’t been remembering my dreams. well, actually i make no efforts to. last night, i do remember i had a nice, my typical story-like dream. veer was there. and in some other dream a coupla days back i witnessed a beautiful, an aweosme bright crimson with streaks of muave sunset.
we (cy and me) had the most awesome time in mumbai last evening. :)
i am feeling different today … i had been feeling since many days … but today it feels that the “difference” has reached someplace … like a shift has been completed …
i think i just witnessed a personality shift. the landmass of my consciousness moved and changed the landscape.
ok people. it’s been 3 days now (or more?) that this guy who calls himself “Dev from Gujarat” has been harassing me with this now irritating SMSs that i don’t reply to and calls that i don’t take.
i have saved all his latest SMSs that i got today, in case i feel the need to lodge an FIR now. here are the ones i got in just the last 2 hrs:
SMS: be my friend? want to know you, understand u n finally want to give u all happiness.
SMS: apke reply ke liye taras gaya hoon aur kitna tadpaoge itna to god bhi nahi tadpata.
SMS: ji apko mujhsey hee dusmani hai? try karne mein kya hoga? plz reply me my luv i m gud fuker.
SMS: sheesh given me your no. he already did with you now v can?
SMS: ab naam to de diya kya prob hai? plz reply me
SMS: now enough if u don’t reply me then i will spread yor num ok?
SMS: also i have a video clip which i ll put on orkut so al pune guys knw bout u and cal u.
______________________________________________________
HERE’s HIS NUMBER: 094288 98448
:)
[contd...]
but he caught her soon enough. the blood was pumping madly into his veins. his entire body was hot like it was on fire. but she turned and made a stern face, “i wish you had some idea how damn tired i am”. she did look tired. “i haven’t even eaten anything, we were in the board room for hours”.
he just let go, abruptly, and then managed to utter, “you want me to fix you something?” he asked sukling. she gave him a tight hug, which he didn’t return, kissed him lightly on the cheek, said a very warm “goodnight baby”, took her clothes off and slid between the sheets in her underwear. she was too tired to even brush and wash. he just stood there, not knowing what to do. to just push her off the bed and then throw into the shower, or maybe just, go out for a long, long walk into the night.
………………………………………………………………………..
she woke up softly, in a sweat. the fan was off. she had no idea what time it was, but it was dark outside. he was lying right next to her, awake, as she could feel his warm body rubbing against her, slowly, very slowly, pushing softly. his face was sunk in her hair, his arm lay streched across her tummy, above the sheet spread over her body. “ummm… you woke me. selfish. what about my 6 am alarm?”
his arm moved over her tummy and he pressed his palm to the sheet on her body, and then in one sudden move, he flung it away. “you keep sleeping, i don’t intend to bother you much” he whispered in her ear. his palm had found her breast and was rubbing her nipple, harder than his own hardness by now. that was his fingers’ favorite past time in the world, squeazing her nipples, teasing them, pulling them, pressing them. it drove her mad. but she showed no reaction. her favorite game; i play dead, you be a ****. tonight, he didn’t mind. tonight, he was going mad and all he needed was her body, in whatever way, however it was, he just needed to posses it, chew on it, eat it, do things to her they both hadn’t even imagined. and she couldn’t pretend dead for long. he knew she was losing it. his lips had found her other nipple and now both her breasts and nipples were being mauled and bitten and sucked and twisted. she was not only completely awake, alive and kicking, she was on fire and wanted to burst.
but suddenly she jerked herself away from him. he was still panting, “wha … what ..!!?!” she tried to hpld her breath and just smiled, a sultry, seductive, naughty smile. she wanted to prolong it, the agony, his agony, her game. “you think i’ll let you be so selfish? i told you i want to get a good night’s sleep. i have to wake up early tomorrow and go for a jog. i haven’t exercised in days.”
“this is good exercise.” he shifted towards her.
“you want to piss me off?” and this time she really did look upset.
she settled her head back onto the pillows. his hand hadn’t left her body and still lay on her tummy. they lay still for awhile. but his hand tonight had a mind of its own. it started moving, ever so gently, so as not to provoke a word from her mouth. he was watching her mouth, her moist lips, completely still, as if asleep, just about sufferign his idiocy. his hand started moving down, towards her belly button. he thought about planting a kiss there, just a small seed, with a promise to grow into a huge baobab. but he decided against it and let his hand stroll around the area. he pressed his fingers just a little, just under her belly button. her soft skin, like a freshly buttered bun-maska felt nice and he started caressing her stomach, forgetting the journey. and then a madness came over his hand and it plunged into the depths of her underwear. her mouth opened and she let out a soft moan.
a smile escaped his lips, “you’re drenched”. “it’s a very natural physical reaction of the body” she said.
“your body wants me. i want your body. why don’t you stay out of it.” and there was no turning back for his fingers then. they slipped and slid at will, breaking all barriers. he put his mouth over her open mouth and sucked, letting out an agonized moan each time his finger slid slightly into her. and she moaned with him, raising herself to meet his fingers, trying to push his fingers, his hand further into the heat.
she hated sweat, but she was loving it now. their bodies sliding over each other’s smoothness. he brought his hand up and came on top of her, massaging the sweat into her breast. and then she lifted herself up and pushed him back. she took her underwear off and sat on top of him, looking into his eyes, smiling. she lifted his hands up and put them on her breasts and raised herself up a little. she stopped her body till just over his hard-on, where the tip of his penis just touched her very hot, very wet cunt. and she pressed, just a little, so that he was in just a little. and she raised herself up. he squeezed her breasts hard a let out a painful moan.
[to be contd...]
i apologize to dino morea and the universe for ever SMSing him silly nothings, and vow never to do it again. :) i hope the universe finds it in its heart to forgive me and nullify any bad karma gathered.
______________________________________________________________________________________________
she came home very late, after a very tiresome meeting with the board members. the top management was hell-bent on removing an entire layer of executives, the ‘New Business’ team who had worked hard all last year getting new contacts, out of which some had materialized into major revenue generating clients. and she knew that it was a rivalry between the team lead, a very good-looking, smart, and well-loved guy and the 40-something, balding, bitter head of the department that had lead to things as they stood now. she, of course, was with the NB lead, no, not just because he was drop-dead gorgeous, but because she knew the kind of effort the entire team had put in last year. she had worked with them on many of the presentations herself, which had bore fruit for all to see. but still, there she was, data notwithstanding, fighting to prevent the annihilation of one of the best teams she had ever worked with.
the meeting went on till about 11:30 in the night. but it was fruitful. the board members were not all that blind to data, especially after the nice presentation the team lead had prepared not only showing the dollar figures and the **** sheets, but also future plans that not only looked promising , but also practicle and achievable. overall, she was satisfied with the way things had proceeded. but the meeting had left her exhausted and she was dying to reach home and just plonk on the bed.
it took her another hour or so, wrapping things up at work and reaching home in her worn-down faded canary yellow VW Bully. she had thought about exercising for at least 15-20 mins before hitting bed, but she gave the idea up just as she reached the building gates feeling the stress in her thighs everytime she moved. though meticulous about parallel parking her van with the wall, this time she just braked within the white painted rectangle, not caring the crooked angle it made with everything around. she was just glad to have reached home. Home! and then she thought about him. she knew he must be waiting, though she had asked him to sleep as she would get late. but she new, he would be sitting there, in the dark, sprawled in the big living room chair, mindlessly watching mindless tv, not caring what he was watching.
and sure enough, there he was. as she had thought, sprawled on the big chair, sunk in it, as if a child sitting in a big petaled flower. sitting there, butt naked, not even paying attention to the images that were moving, yes, mindlessly, on the tube. it were just his eyes that were on the tv screen, his mind, his mind was somewhere else. with her. loving her, kissing her. he’d been caressing his erection since evening, when he had last talked with her on the computer, when she had transported a huge, wet kiss through the internet. when in mood, she could be really naughty. and she had some time to kill before that big meeting of hers. she spent every second of that time teasing him, uploading for him pictures of her she had clicked in the office loo. she had left him so horny that he was sure that the bloody thing will burst. he hadn’t been able to do anything since. so now he just sat there, sprawled, streched, aching, waiting like a hungry lion, ready to pounce. she had promised that she’ll be home by 11. till 11:30 and there was no sign of her. she had put the mobile on silent and he knew it was no use calling her. he had no choice but to just bear the agony, or he could drive over to her work and just wait for her there. he loved fondling her in the car anyways. but there was no way that she would leave her van behind, so he gave up that idea. he just sat around for a while, and then he took his shorts off. he wanted to free his desires, his dreams, his dreams of everyday, and every night, of holding her naked body against his naked body, never letting her go.
he heard the key turn in the door, and a wave of heat spread through his entire body starting from his heart. he felt a tingle in his dick and his balls were on fire, literally. he lay low, not moving, looking very funny, statue still, with this huge, really hard hard-on. but he didn’t move. she entered and noticed the tv glow in the dark living room, and no motion. she let out a small laugh. she found him just too cute … cute and predictable … one of the zillion things she loved about him. she went into the kitchen, filled a glass with some water, walked across the hallway, reached his big chair and overturned the glass. and then she ran.
[to be contd...]
i agree. kutton ko bhaav hee nahi dena chahiye … saaley dum hilatey aatey hein fir peechhey …
it’s a metaphor .. i truly, positively, most definitely, LOVE dogs. the history of my relationships shows that … HAHAHAHA!!! :) no really, i absolutely LOOOOOVE dogs. :)
____________________________________________________________________________________________
a client call started at 8 pm, when i got a call on my mobile, which i didn’t pick as i didn’t know the number, and 2nd, ‘a client call was just starting’. and hence started a string of msgs from a number i have saved as ’some asshole’. i typed out the no here but deleted it as i thought … i dunno what i thought.
i deleted the msgs as is my habit to save space, so i am just reproducing the general flow on the “msg” convo:
Some Asshole:
Dear (somehow, i HATE this salutation), i know you are at home and not piking up. give me a missed call if yuo get free.
Me:
Dear hu?
Some Asshole:
this is dev from gujarat, you are J****** right? (asshole spelt my name wrong.)
Me:
dev hu?
Some Asshole:
a frend of a frend gave me your number, i will tell you once we talk.
Me:
a person who gives my number to strangers is no frend of mine.
Some Asshole:
i am a good fuker, … (and i can’t remeber the rest)
Some Asshole:
luk i am serious about longterm relationship.
Some Asshole:
i know about you. divorcee, got a child. luk, i am serious about long term relationship, please reply.
people just need to get a life….
i feel nothing now. which is good. as in, not sad nothing. but awesome nothing. so if i have to put words to my feelings, i’d say i feel good. :) relaxed … my body is happy. after the awesome tandoori (aloo) parantha, which i had after the paav-bhaji and some of sul’s roti and mix veg for lunch in Shirdi; and the chicken noodles for dinner; and after the gobi parantha this morning; i do not feel guilty, or shitty, or simply pathtic, esp for the huge dollop of butter with the gobi parantha instead of the no-fat margarine i usually have as it’s finished. i feel good. :) may the force be with me.
we had a very tiring, but very wholesome day visiting the Sai Baba temple at Shirdi yesterday. although i was appalled by the complete inconsiderateness shown to all that the Baba was about. and Baba was all about humility, and being down to earth, and loving, and most of all approachable. with an expensive gold and i think diamond studded “mukut” (crown), and the amount of hassles one has to go through just to get a glimpse (darshan) of Baba’s statue, one is going completely against what the Baba stood for. i think it’s a huge waste of time and effort and money, and i think the true devotees should just stay home and think of Baba and smile and love and wish for well-being of all. well, most of the hassle is due to the throng of people, and these are not your regular loving and sweet citizens of the good world. these are a highly hurried lot, who run about in panick when they can achieve the same results by being calm. so many times i had to harden my voice like a huge rock, and give a real dirty stare and tell the people shoving from behind that it’s pointless, that they will eventually get the darshan never-the-less, that they are crushing my child. and they gave nervous grins and looked here and there. and then there was this aunty who broke the line somewhere far behind and reached to stand just behind me and i wouldn’t let her cross me as i wouldn’t let anyone cross me. and she was continously crushing her rather large, and very soft and warm breasts in to my back. it was a most uncomfortable feeling. and we stood in that line for about like, 2 hrs, and regulars told us that it wasn’t too crowded that day. ah!
we also went to a Shani temple, about an hour or so away from Shirdi; i am not sure exactly how long it took us to reach there as i slept most of the journey and since i don’t tie a watch on my wrist i don’t keep a tab on when we started and when we reached. well, it was very sunny, and very hot, and the only thing that stands out in my mind is that black rock and this (forgive me dear Shani lord) 15-16 year boy standing in just a lungi, swathed in mustard oil, head to toe, pouring more and more mustard oil on the black rock, the oil that devotess were handing to other volunteers standing on the stage-like area. he, that boy, had an aesthetically built upper-body, like a swimmers, smooth and taut, and very … adolescent. he could make for a good sketch … hmm…..
ye chirag bujh rahein hein…
ye chirag bhuj rahein hein…
ye chirag bhuj rahein hein,
merey saath jaltey-jaltey …
~song: chaltey-chaltey | movie: pakeezah
are they really gone … the times of awesome scripts. remember the scene in the movie? when the priest asks “what’s the bride’s name?”, and she looks up, in horror, in shame, eyes perplexed, and he so … determinedly says, “pakeezah”. it’s a raise-the-hair-on-your-arms scene.
M’s (HAPPY) birthday today .. :)
do go ahead and wish her … :)
after a lot of pouring around, turning, and churning, and mixing, comes the yummy, yummy, white butter. thus it takes that much grinding, mixing, and blending of the brain tissues and various emotions and feelings for something truly beautiful to be created … as far as the arts, or literature are concerned.