i guess the .. will, to say anything has kinda … vanished .. or maybe its just these drab walls … these virtual walls. i don’t like them. these sad, drab, i think dull colors. i’ve been asking veer to change the look for so long … but i guess he’s busy. i wish i could do it.

yes. its been a long, long, long time since i last ‘wrote’. actually i have been lacking any coherent thought … for all this time. mostly disturbed, by things i can’t really put my finger on. also this job. not really satisfying. so i have been writhing in pain doing things i don’t really wish to do, but need to. sometime back V had mentioned that if we can, we should have a trust for people who wish to go on a sabbatical for a year or so. well, at first it seemed nice, but then … i don’t know, if i wanna go on a sabbatial, i will plan accordingly, work accordingly, save accordingly, and hence temporarily retire accordingly.

hmmm…. but that hasn’t been happening. i’ve been wanting to stop this 9-5 routine for so long now, but its just not happening. everytime i think of saving some, something or the other happens, and i end up spending. a year of trying, and i still haven’t been able to save a decent amount. its very disheartening. this thought that i’ll die doing this. this ‘job’.

ahhh!!! my neck hurts. i wanna go home and sleep!!

papaji, P, lets open that shop … *sigh*